Wow, has it really been that long? Time is flying by this week. Do you like the new layout? Anyway, I just went through something kind of nice, the kind of feeling you need when you start to feel like life is slipping out of your control. I typed it all out to my friend Eric on offline im’s, so here it is as I presented to him:
well, I have just finished reading Memoirs of a Geisha for the second time. and it is even more beautiful than I remember it.
in the book, Sayuri’s life is a defenite path, destined by fate up to the very end, and it wasn’t revealed to her until then.
my life has never really felt like i was on any kind of path, and that I was stumbling along blindly. But when the picture gets less complicated, I see a clear truth…. one that’s so personal I don’t know if i should tell even you, that makes me realize how connected everything is, and how things will eventually work out.
today at work I was reading a passage in the book that was so close to what I’ve been feeling lately, I had to stop reading, because it would have made me cry… but then I wrote something, and even a little poem to go with it, and I want to show them to you tomorrow.
life is so beautiful sometimes that I can’t even put it into a thought, a feeling, or an expression… and the human language being so feeble when trying to show emotions (or maybe just in my hands) I wouldn’t even be able to begin explaining it to you…
but it catches me so that I can’t even breathe, and can’t even cry. it’s like my heart stops beating in order to capture the moment, but it leaves anyway. but I can always feel it.
comforting me… like being the only beautiful silver strand holding me up to understanding life, and showing me the tiniest glimmer of hope that makes all the sorrow, fear, and confusion of life worthwhile.
Well, that’s it. Perhaps tomorrow I might post that little poem I was talking about, but for now, it’s bedtime… bye!
Lindsey @ 1:39AM
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