I now have a forum. Just so you know.

Go to the forum.

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Okay, you guys know I’ve been Harry Potter obsessed lately…

Well, when I read the fourth book (Goblet of Fire) for the first time I immediately wanted to play the character of Fleur Delacour in the movie. She’s a witch from the french school Beaxbatons that has long silvery blonde hair, very pretty, and has a strong French accent.

I figured I probably wouldn’t get the part… I’m not that pretty, but I do have white-blondish hair and I can speak really well with almost any accent. And usually for the smaller parts in Harry Potter they have open casting calls. I found the casting call for Fleur, and I got really excited because it said any girl with blonde hair, looks 16 or 17, and then it said…

You must be from England.

That really sucks… I mean I knew I wasn’t going to get the part, but it would have been really freaking cool to say I auditioned for a Harry Potter movie. And who knows? They probably would have made me an extra, at least.

sigh Guess my movie break will have to come some other day.

Okay, so Amber decided not to come because Hellboy is out of the theater, so Crystal and I went to Mean Girls, which we both really wanted to see. Sadly. It was really funny though… it really did remind me of Heathers, except without Christian Slater trying to kill everyone. There was almost killing though… TWICE.

After the movie, Crystal and I talked and talked and went to B & J’s and talked and talked and talked. It was crazy. We must have been just talking for about 4 hours. It’s like one of those conversations where you really should leave, because you are in a parking lot at 2:30 in the morning, and your bladder is about to explode, and you just can’t… because you’ve just thought of something really cool to say in response to something really cool the other person just said. So fun.

Also yesterday, I decided I would call Randy and tell him why… well, it was kind of a nostalgic talk. He was talking about Jeremy too, and I realized two things: my self-esteem must be worse than I thought, and I never want to stop being friends with Jeremy and Randy. Ever. The self-esteem thing, well… I can’t even say why. It’s so ridiculous. Randy and Jeremy have this ridiculous notion. I’ve just chalked it up to them both being so dramatic and listening to Billy Joel too much. They are the best friends I’ve ever had though. little tear I miss them.

Anyhoo, here are some pictures I didn’t get a chance to put up the other day. They are when Tyler, Alesha and I went to Tulsa the day before he left for his internship, so… last Thursday.

It is now 5:49, and I have to leave for Carmike at 6:45, and I have to take a shower. So of course, I am making a journal entry and spending useless time on the computer. Of course. No, I am not going to work, I am going to see a movie with Crystal and Amber, two friends from high school that I’ve really missed hanging out with. I went to see Kill Bill Vol. 2 by myself, as I have always had some natural kind of guy repellant, and they were there, and we totally cracked up and had the greatest time, and probably annoyed the rest of the theater I’m sure. So we want to do it again!! This time most likely in Hellboy.

Tyler called me last night!! I read his web page too, and it’s so nice to hear that he’s enjoying himself. You are so awesome Tyler!! I love you.

I had other important stuff to say… what was it? Hmm. I forget. Crap. Uh, my mom got a new oven, it’s very beautiful, I’m about to piss my pants in anticipation of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. That’s right. I have an announcement to make.

HARRY POTTER OPENS IN THEATERS JUNE 4TH. I AM TAKING OFF WORK AND GOING TO WATCH IT IN TULSA AT PROBABLY 7 O’CLOCK. ANYONE ELSE WANTING TO GO NEEDS TO CONTACT ME, EITHER CELL PHONE, E-MAIL, OR YAHOO INSTANT MESSENGER(eternalcookie). I’m hardly ever the one to set this stuff up, but this time I am totally the ringleader. Mahahaaa… IMPORTANT: YOU MUST BE WILLING TO BE SEEN WITH SOMEONE WHO WILL JUMP UP AND DOWN CLAPPING WHILE IN LINE AND MAY OR MAY NOT BE WEARING SOME TIME OF HARRY POTTER COSTUME. ALSO BE PREPARED FOR DELIGHTED SQUEALING FOR AT LEAST 15 MINUTES AFTER THE MOVIE IS OVER. THAT IS ALL.

Have I ever mentioned that men are total shit? Because they are.

Never again. Never ever.

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And you can take that to the fucking bank, baby.

Above are my Mother’s Day photos. My mom and grandma and I went to church and then Baker’s. Yum! And I have updated the photography page. It’s now like a monthly photo diary, and remember to hover on a picture for an explanation, and click to enlarge. Well, only on the photography page.

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Janel’s house Tuesday. Dear lord that was a crazy night. Wow. Much fun though. We watched the first Harry Potter movie, which immediately got me really excited about the third one coming out, and as soon as I got home, I had to start reading the books again. I really have no clue how they’re going to keep making just one movie for each book. The fifth book is over 800 pages.

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Last night at Paul and Bryan’s was really fun!!! I got to see Jessica and Andy, who I haven’t seen in forever, and I got most everybody’s address and stuff. Oh yeah, please feel free to e-mail me your address, phone number(s), and birthdate so I can put it in my address book and send you a postcard when I get to Hawai’i.

This morning, I had my 5th lightning encounter. You may or may not already know that I have been almost struck by lightning four times. This morning, I wasn’t really almost struck, so now I’m calling them “lightning encounters.” Or, in other words, encounters of the electrical kind. I was sitting in my living room in the chair close to the window (which is MY chair), enjoying the thunder and reading, and all of a sudden there’s a very bright flash, I hear some kind of a pop or a snap somewhere in my house, and then my toes started tingling very strongly. It just lasted for an instant, but I immediately realized that electricity was exiting my body through my toes. Also I was kind of disoriented for a minute. It’s very weird to describe what that feels like if you haven’t experienced it. The lightning shivers, what I call them, has happened to me several times, usually when I’m outside and there’s lightning about half a mile away or closer. It’s very much like that little crackly feeling you get when you’re standing right next to a TV when it’s turned on or off but much stronger, but then again, that just might be me as well. What can I say? I have an electric personality. 😀

Sorry… anyway this is the strongest I’ve ever felt it. I’ve also accidentally touched my thumb to a prong as I was plugging it in. That one really hurt, but it was just in the one area. Lightning shivers are all over, like it’s an expanding field in the atmosphere. Very odd…

Well, hope I’m okay tonight. Tyler and Alesha and I are going to try to go to Tulsa and eat at Mimi’s Cafe and go dancing, but that may be canceled on account of the weather. We’ll see… Konbanwa minna-san!!

Some photos from our Studio 54/310 Tulsa trip. An excellent time was had by all!! Wow, today Tyler and I went to work out, and afterwards we ate at Azalea Cafe and got to see Tiffany! Yay! There’s been a couple of things really heavy on my mind lately, and I just poured out my soul to Tyler, and he really made me feel lots better. Thanks Tyler!!!

I’m kind of behind on the pictures here, so tomorrow I’ll post pictures from Mother’s Day, last night at Janel’s and tonight at Bryan’s, and then I’ll try to stay updated on time. 😀 Ja ne!

Excuse me when I say, “Wah!”

I hate it when I’m in these moods. They really suck. I suck. Everything sucks. Hence why I hate these moods. I’m not sure why, but I just realized that I am so totally left out. But in a really weird way. Like it’s fate or something. It’s not really so much because of the way I am or the way other people are, it’s just… there. Have you ever felt so alone it’s as if outside of your door, no one else exists? I could walk out right now and not see anybody. Even my mom, if she were here. I would see them, but I wouldn’t SEE them. They wouldn’t see me. And that is true loneliness. And I say this all very factual, because I don’t necessarily feel sad, I’m just observing. And no matter where I go… Hawaii, Japan, I’ll still be alone. My facet of the universe will be forever encaged in the glassy walls of my mind, because there is no true connection.

And at the same time we are all connected… I don’t understand it.

(I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead*

*I think I made you up inside my head)