Category: letomoon.lindsey.net

I have this weird feeling. I don’t really know the word for it… maybe… disenchanted? No. More like a mixture of sadness, hoplessness, and comfort, if that makes any sense. Almost like… melancholy. The kind of feeling where you want to listen to classical female vocalists and sit and just look inside yourself.
Except I feel this strange comfort, just a settling calm like I know I’m here and can’t be moved, or something like that. I just want to sit and breathe for the sake of breathing. Because it lets me know that I’m alive, lets me know that the world is real, and so am I. The past few days I’ve felt so many emotions, and I keep wondering if they’re even real. But I look in the mirror, I see myself, I feel the air filling my lungs, and I know I’m real. And I’ll always have that. Even when I don’t know what I’m thinking or feeling. Or what I’m supposed to be thinking or feeling.
I made a wishlist today to put on my site. But they’re all material possesions. What I really wish for is peace. A renewed love of life. Love for myself. More time to spend with my loved ones. More time to know myself.
Lindsey @ 8:12PM

Well, I didn’t get stood up like I thought, it was just a mix-up.
There’s not really anything else to say. I’m a little sad right now, but it’s nothing to worry about, just my own stupidity. Just me letting other people step all over my feelings. I knew I should have just stayed away from guys. Ah, well, lessons for the future. This won’t happen again. Ever. That’s for sure. *sigh*
Lindsey @ 8:22PM

Alright. Just a little pissed off here. Don’t really like it when friends say they’ll call and they don’t and instead go off and do other things. Well, that’s okay. Because I’m not going to let it get to me. It’s just sad when I have to close myself off for fear of being hurt because of jerks like this. *sigh*
In other aspects, this has been a great day. I feel good, just a little restless. Nothing some driving around didn’t cure, though. I went to Hastings and saw Randy. That was a little weird. So we’re supposed to do something tomorrow. It’ll be nice to catch up.
Lindsey @ 9:37PM

Hey everyone. I’ve added a Neobadge to the bottom of my page. (Yes! It’s true! I’m a Neopets phr34k!!) Anyway, my goal for completion of all my pages is December 1st. If you’ve been checking, you notice that I haven’t really updated lately. That’s because life is CRAZY!!! So sorry about that.
Umm… not anything else really interesting happening. I’ve been reading some online comics lately, Megatokyo and Sinfest. They’re both great.
Lindsey @ 2:08PM

Well, things have taken an interesting turn. In many areas of my life. That’s very strange, to wake up and the world has changed overnight, and forgotten to tell you what was going on. That’s been happening a lot lately. I’m in kind of a bad mood today. Well, I don’t feel it, but when I talk it seems like there’s all these horribly bitchy things coming out of my mouth. So I sit there amazed at what I just said, thinking “Where did that come from?”
One good thing happened today. I got whistled at by a middle schooler. Woo. Hoo. I watched Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon last night, and I did a lot of thinking. And I didn’t really figure anything out except that I was happy. Which is pretty good, I guess.
Lindsey @ 1:40PM

Ugh. I hate reminiscing about the past. Especially middle school. All the stupid things you did, all the immature ways you acted, all the crazy feelings you had. HA. Figures. Just as I started typing this, Vitamin C’s “Graduation” came on. I did like high school. Man, I miss everybody. Especially Junction. *sniff* It’s not gonna help that I’m going to the Muskogee game tonight. It’s senior night too, as I hear. Crazy stuff, these people are two years younger than me… And it still feels like I never left.
I’m home for Fall Break! Yay! Need that nice relaxing break. It’s wonderful not having to worry about if you have your keys for a change. One thing about being an RA, if you’re at the dorms, you’re constantly on guard, very jumpy. At home I can just relax. Not to mention my mom’s hot chocolate… *drool* And Steakburgers. (Sorry, Gina, I love meat!) I didn’t realize how many nice things I like about Muskogee until I was away for more than a month. They’re very lacking in Tahlequah. No Jones Cream Soda, no pretzel nuggets w/ cheese, no MALL. It’s horrible.
Lindsey @ 12:10PM

Wow. There was an Anthrax scare at Wal-Mart today. Yes, that’s right, an Anthrax scare in little old Tahlequah. And I was here to witness it. Well, I didn’t actually witness it. And it’s probably just a mistake. An employee saw some white powder by the magazines. But they closed it down just the same, seeing as that guy in Florida died the very next day. I’m a little scared.
My jaw hurts. I’ve been thinking lately about a lot of different things. Especially life in general. If you have the opportunity, you should really read the book The Tao of Pooh. It’s changed my view on life. Okay, going to bed. Tired of comprehensive thought.
Lindsey @ 12:34AM

Well, the Roswell premiere didn’t horribly impress me, but it was alright. I think it was just a little too much action for an hour premiere, it should have been two hours like Buffy. But looking at the spoilers for episodes 3-6, I think it’s going to even out nicely. It was still awesome, though, to see Max and Liz together again. I want to hear her tell him about futere Max and how she didn’t sleep with Kyle. I can’t wait for that. ^-^
It’s EXTREMELY rainy here. I didn’t go to any of my classes today. It’s basically been a boring, dreary day. Walking around in the rain was fun though.
Lindsey @ 4:11PM

Oh, boy. Roswell premieres today. I didn’t finish the Roswell site!! But I will put the episode summary up right away. ^-^ I’m so nervous. I hope this season is really good and UPN didn’t screw it up. They did Buffy wonderfully, so I have hope, but the commercials scare me. Liz skinnydipping? Please. Even the semi-recent death of Alex and learning that Max is a father couldn’t change her that much. Could it?
Enough rambling about that. Right now it’s way too early, I have class tomorrow, and I’m listening to the Fight Club soundtrack, which is putting me in a really creepy mood. I did make a new site though. But no telling, it’s a secret, and it’s not finished yet.
Yay! Roswell! Heehee, okay, going to bed.
Lindsey @ 1:43AM

Yay. New layout! This layout was inspired by two beautiful images, one of Katherine Heigl, and the other of a butterfly. And I love this color, so… I really like this layout, I think it’s going to stay up a long time so I can work on my other sites.
I declared my major today. ^-^ Yay chemistry.
Oh, wow… FTP just deleted this whole page, but thankfully there was Eric. ^-^ Yay! I’m so grateful, thank you Eric!!
The girls in the quad are decorating for halloween!! I’m so proud. *gush* Yay, all for now.
Lindsey @ 9:20PM