Category: Old Blog Archives

Hello, everyone. I’m in a very…. bad kind of mood. Not really angry, just… I dunno. Anyway, haven’t written the past few days because we {my household} have had to do some home improvement to our roof. {It leaked on my bed!!! >_< Grr…} So haven’t really had time to get to the compy. I just watched America’s Sweethearts. It was really funny, I recommend it. Rather jumpy plot though. Well, it didn’t really jump around, it just… concentrated on one thing for a long time, and the next thing for just a few minutes… you get the idea. Still great, though!! I would pay to see this movie, if not just for the stars. There was a preview on it for a movie about baseball players, and tons of actors {and actress} I recognized, like Jessica Biel, Freddie Prinze, Jr., the guy that played Riley on Buffy, Matthew Lillard, all kinds of fun. That one’s a must see. As is American Pie 2. I just LOVE Alyson Hannigan. LOVE. She’s great. EEK! I can’t wait for Buffy next season. I also can’t wait for September 24th. That’s when FX starts showing Buffy from the beginning. I didn’t really get to see the first two seasons because that’s when our local cable didn’t have WB. Now, about the WB, I could really care less. Scum. Anyway.
I feel horrible about a lot of things. I know you’re thinking, “Great. Another whiny blog.” but WAIT. I have good reasons. I was talking with Randy tonight about all kinds of past things, and I hurt one of my friends really bad. I think that is the only time I have intentionally hurt someone. It was about three years ago, and it was Jeremy. And it just now hit me, tonight, how horrible that was. I really feel very ashamed. Jeremy, I don’t know if you even read this, but I’m sorry. From the bottom of my heart.
I also feel awful because my domain situation isn’t going very well. I just feel like I can’t make a good layout or have traffic or be one of the best. That’s not completely what I’m going for, but it would be nice. When {if} I get my own domain, hopefully it will be better.
I do feel good about one thing though. I looked in the mirror tonight and felt really pretty. That doesn’t happen a lot, but I think I’m finally getting used to the skin I’m in. Took me long enough. 19 years. Blah, I’m going. I made a really good poem and I’m going to see if I can’t toss it on a pic and make a nice layout. Bye.
Lindsey @ 2:51AM

Yay!!! Survey’s up!!! Go take it!! Wow, my little site is just expanding away… bwahahahaha!!!
Lindsey @ 1:03AM

Hi, everyone! I went to kabalarians.com to see my name analysis. I’ve been there before, a long time ago, but anyway, here’s the analysis. Very accurate.
The name of Lindsey creates an overly-sensitive nature which causes you to sense and feel far more than you can understand or put into words. You have a deep, artistic, and creative side which shows through a love for music and literature. Writing is a more natural mode of expression for your deeper thoughts and feelings than the spoken word. You have an ability to concentrate and work intently on anything which holds your interest. However, you prefer to avoid routine, monotony, and mental tasks. You enjoy the out-of-doors and find your greatest peace and relaxation from the beauty and harmony of nature. You prefer to limit your friendships and associations to those who share your interests and appreciate your quiet, refined ways. Others often find it difficult to understand you. Your feelings tend to build up within you and, if you cannot release them through a creative, constructive channel, you could suffer with frustration, moods, and much inner turmoil. This name causes tension in the region of the solar plexus, as well as the heart and lungs. Health problems would centre in those areas of the body.

Scarily accurate. And look at my online name, Leto:
Your name of Leto gives you a very idealistic but passive outlook on life. You desire culture and all the refinements of life but you are inclined to live in your dreams. Although you would like to do many things, procrastination undermines your accomplishment and success in life. You do not like to create issues and will do anything to avoid a conflict. Making decisions is difficult for you without the support and approval of others. This name gives you a very sensitive nature, making you feel much that you do not understand. Your feelings are easily hurt, at which times you are inclined to withdraw and become uncommunicative. Although you desire the friendship and association of others, you find it difficult to express your thoughts through the spoken word, and others find you hard to get to know. It is much more natural for you to express your deeper thoughts in writing. Inner tension can deplete your physical vitality. You are inclined to indulge in rich foods that lack proper nourishment. The physical weaknesses due to this name centre in the heart and respiratory organs, and in the fluid functions.

Very close to Lindsey. These people are so on the ball. Anyway, outie.
Lindsey @ 3:18PM

Allo… I put a new section up: blog mania. I was thinking, “Hey! I like these blogs and read them almost everyday! Shouldn’t I let other people have that chance?” So there it is. Some don’t update very often, but they make up for it in design. That reminds me, I’ve been very dry creative-wise lately. Well, I did make a layout today, but I don’t want to use it except with a chromeless pop-up {like this}. See, I have a very cheap but very lacking host. I only have 5MB’s, which is really enough, but it doesn’t support cgi’s. That’s really annoying. I’ve wanted to put Greymatter up, and a 404 page, and now the chromeless pop-up and I can’t. So I’ve been looking for a new place. New domain. I’m pretty sure about rinji.net, and I think I found a really good server. It’s 50MB’s, supports practically anything, and it’s 50 bucks a year. That’s 30 more than what I’m paying now, but I think it’s worth it. I was telling my mom about it, and she said, “Do you make any money off of this?” I said no, of course not, but every hobby has it’s cost. Besides, this is more like self-expression.
Lindsey @ 11:30PM

Hehe, put up little comment area. Talk to me!! Working on a survey…
Lindsey @ 11:56PM

Hello again all. I just got done looking at my senior yearbook and I’m so nostalgic. I miss everybody and all our little inside jokes. I miss eating lunch with Betha, Annie, and Marisa in the cafeteria, I miss making fun of Andy with Kiki, I miss going home at the end of the day just a little bit happier, I miss drawing with Amanda at lunch, and yes, I even miss practicing for football games on the soaking marching field in the rain. It seems the more time that goes by, the more I realize that high school was really fun. I mean I look forward to every day with hope because life gets better all the time, but I do miss seeing everybody everyday. ^-^
Well, life has been pretty uneventful lately. So that’s why there’s not much posting going on. But I move back in to school on the 8th, and I start my RA training (!!) so life should get pretty hectic then. But I will be sure and try to make it to the computer labs to update… (It sux not having a compy for school.) Eek, that means I need to finish my Roswell site pretty quick.
Oh, car situations changed. My next door neighbor is selling a car and I think this one is a keeper, since my mom suggested it to me. It’s kind of old, but at least it goes over 45 mph (aww, my poor little exhausted Geo just can’t cut it anymore). Bye!
Lindsey @ 1:17AM

I’m tired of writing and doing things for everyone else but myself. Why should I have to prove to anyone that I can think like an adult? I know I do, and that should be enough. I wish….
I wish I didn’t care what other people thought of me. I wish it were like getting stressed. If I want to be calm, I just stop stressing out. I wish it were that easy with trying to always please everyone, I wish I could just… stop. I wish that I didn’t care if I hurt someone’s feelings, or made a bad impression. I’m me. ME. So you can accept me at face value because I’m not going to change to be what you want me to be, and I’m not going to act like you thought I would just to please you. I’m not going to sort around my personality just so you’ll like me, I’m not going to hold my tongue because I’m afraid I’ll say something that will turn you away from me. I’m responsible, confident, a leader, I’m blunt, I love God, I love me, I love my life. And I will not change/alter/distort any of these things because it would be easier on YOU!!
If only it were that easy to feel this way 100% of the time.
Lindsey @ 2:26AM

Well, we went to the sidewalk sale yesterday at the mall, but I didn’t get my hair cut. Maybe I’ll go to Planet Studio for that. Here’s what I got:
Bath and Body Works – lipstick, eyeliner, and foundation
Claire’s – silver hoop earrings, cherry hair chopsticks
Buckle – purple polo shirt, white snap shirt, purple metallic shirt
Gap – flowy green shirt
Vanity – very nice LEI khakis
Everything fit and looked great! A very good shopping day. Well, I better get in the shower and tackle my to-do list before work. Oy, it’s gonna be busy.
Lindsey @ 3:17PM

Everyone says I look really nice today. Must be the lipstick. Eric made me some meditation beads for just absentmindedly playing with to ease stress. They’re really pretty but they already broke and he has to fix them. I’m staying for the late show {12:00} for Jurassic Park. I saw all these people I know tonight, like Andy H. and Katie B. and Lori S. and Clint B. Clint looks so different!!! It’s amazing. Of course it has been about 4 years since I’ve seen him.
Lindsey @ 11:37PM

Hello, I’m at work, and I’m feeling kinda down about myself. A lot of popular girls from middle school showed up, looking as rich as ever, and I’m just feeling very poor and ugly. I’ve determined what makes you look rich just by watching people:
1) a deep tan {this one is the most difficult for me}
2) well-dressed {I can do that…}
3) clean {I’m already that}
4) well-trimmed hair {I need to get a haircut… hmm, maybe today}
5) silver hoop earrings, or other silver earrings
6) a manicure {yay! my specialty}
Okay, tonight I’ll go shopping, get a haircut and give myself a manicure… ^-^
Lindsey @ 3:30PM

I’ve been thinking lately about how shoddy my web page is. I think I’m going to add a survey. And change the layout… maybe keep the pic, but give it a more techno look. Must really try pic combining. I’ll have to figure out the newer PSP. Ugh, so bored. Can’t believe it’s only 3:20. I want to go home. And my Game Boy’s batteries have gone patooey. I was stuck anyway. Debra Triplett, the regional boss, showed up. I always get so nervous when she’s here. But she’s gone now, it’s okay.
Lindsey @ 3:20PM

On the way to work, it was wonderful, jamming to Moulin Rouge. My speakers are great. My car sounds a lot more expensive than it is. And the bass is pretty good, too. Anyway, here I am sitting in the box at work. It was a pretty nice morning, except I think I need a haircut… or I should do something with it.
Lindsey @ 11:46AM

Oh, my goooooooddddneess… It has been EXTREMELY busy. Very hectic, running around. I think I’m starting to get a stress headache. Or maybe it’s because I’m squinting. I dunno. Well, I wanted to come see Jurassic Park 3 tonight but it’s way too busy. I guess we could see Legally Blonde… No, I need to do housework, and besides I haven’t even watched Save the Last Dance, which I rented a long time ago.
Lindsey @ 3:00PM

Riding in the car on the way to Vicki’s to get my ear checked. She’ll probably want to give me a shot. She’s like that. No, she’s a good doctor. Ugh, didn’t get anything done today I wanted to. Must do laundry when I get back. Installing CD-player tonight!!
Lindsey @ 3:10PM

Back from Vicki’s. I did get a shot but it wasn’t bad. She telling me how she had to do checkups at a troublesome-girl place at Camp Gruber. I think it was her way of telling me she was proud of me.
Lindsey @ 4:51PM

I just had a great idea for a layout. A picture of a window (store-window or car, preferably car for the nice sheen) reflecting the setting sun. I’d call it “Reflections of a Forgotten Past” and talk about how we are all made up of our past, even if we try to forget it. I’m brilliant. Well, car CD-player is installed and working!! (Thanks to Randy) All the speakers miraculously worked. I even thanked God, out loud. I believe he wants me to have a little happiness, even if it’s something as mundane as my car speakers working.
Lindsey @ 8:34PM

Something weird is happening. I was sitting at computer and felt really strange: dizzy, hot temples, weak. I hope it’s not the Ultram, these pain pills Vicki gave me. Wow… seeing spots now. Better go.
Lindsey @ 1:11AM

I’m at work, 11.15 to 5, and already very bored. Theo didn’t show up, so that means I have to do double the work. Ugh. At least I brought my Game Boy! ^-^ Bought the Zelda game yesterday. And a car CD player. Yesterday afternoon was spent with Randy in front of my house taking the old one out. Tonight we’re going to clean my car out!!! *mock excitement*
Lindsey @ 12:15PM

Just now a very government-agent looking man who seems very nice, spilled popcorn and drink all over the hallway. Dang Theo. If he had been here, I wouldn’t have had to clean it up. Helpless when it comes to cleaning things properly, I grabbed two handfuls of the really thick paper towels and laid them neatly over the spot (after sweeping up all the popcorn and ice, of course) and gently stepped on them. A woman waiting for her little girl to come out of the bathroom must have thought I was crazy. Stepping on the now-brown paper towels, I felt like an incompetent child, and realized I will never have good domestic skills.
Lindsey @ 1:28PM

Am writing too much. I know. Can’t help it. I just saw the strangest thing. Two women came to the theater, each with a daughter. One woman was tall and dark-headed, the other was short and blonde. Their daughters looked JUST LIKE THEM!! Like little carbon-copies. It was like looking at a flashback.
Mmm… A skinny woman bought a Snickers and flung a craving on me.
Lindsey @ 2:25PM

Well, Theo’s absence is now explained. He has a relative close to death in San Antonio and his family is going to see him. Now I feel bad for danging him. Must remember to tell Dale he won’t be back until Sunday. I just went to Shawnee restaurant for Dale, and a man drinking coffee there had drawn a beautiful scene on a napkin, trees in a forest. I wish I could do things like that. But you know me: jack-of-all-trades, master of none. So sad. Well, this is getting ridiculous, writing every little thing of interest down. But it’s so nice to get my thoughts down on paper {or Internet in the blog’s case}. It’s also because Eric’s gone to church camp and I have no one to tell my mundane thoughts to. Geez, I’m such a wimp. What did I do before Eric? I can’t believe I held all these thoughts in. Now I know why Stephanie Bellah would fill notebooks. It’s very calming, to just write down my train of thought. Otherwise my thoughts just bounce around inside my head, causing chaos and stress. Now I’m like a stream, finally getting down to becoming more like my element. Peace is getting easier to achieve and it’s lovely. 🙂
Lindsey @ 3:08PM

At this rate, I’m going to fill up my diary by the end of the week. I better get some notebooks. I’m in the parking lot of Economy, waiting for Randy to get off work. There’s a long line in the drive-thru though, and the techs do all the work. Driving on the west side of Muskogee at 5PM is like being in all that slow-moving work traffic like in the movies. Very slow, very painful. And why do people feel that they have to jam themselves in as close as possible? I refuse, which causes a big gap in front of me, but half an inch behind me as if that person is trying to compensate for my lack of impatience. Really, I’m never in any kind of hurry to get anywhere, but if I don’t watch out I get that driving-induced rage which I think comes from deisel fumes in the hot sun.
Lindsey @ 5:17PM